i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
