it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
