Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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