i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Randomize
