i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
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