I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
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