So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
