his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Randomize
