If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
Randomize
