I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
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