how hairy? two words: wookie tits
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
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