Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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