I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
Randomize
