I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Just got your voicemail. The 3am call wasn't a drunk dial, it was an I left my phone in my pocket then has wild animalistic sex dial...
I hate you.
You LOVE me.
Randomize
