Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Randomize
