So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
Are we still banned from the library?
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
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