Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
someone get that fucking seahorse.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
