I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
