i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
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