thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize
