he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize
