Already got asked if we're dating
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Randomize
