Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
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