Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(732): View more from New Jersey

The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.

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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.

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(636): View more from Missouri

Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.

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(970): View more from Colorado

Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain

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(778): View more from British Columbia

He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.

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(754): View more from Florida

Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.

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(561): View more from Florida

I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point

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(310): View more from California

Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?

(951): View more from California

You told me to go grocery shopping.

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(248): View more from Michigan

I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.

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