Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Randomize
