i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
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