I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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