do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
