Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
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