Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(847): View more from Illinois

we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.

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(630): View more from Illinois

just tell him i said nine months

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.

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(734): View more from Michigan

so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it

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(269): View more from Michigan

I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.

(616): View more from Michigan

Who said I want to share with you?

(269): View more from Michigan

You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.

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(541): View more from Oregon

And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor

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(574): View more from Indiana

There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party

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(828): View more from North Carolina

Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?

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(870): View more from Arkansas

If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.

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