quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
Randomize
