I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
