She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
