brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
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