This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Even my vagina gasped.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
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