I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Randomize
