i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Randomize
