Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
I wear drunk well.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize
