It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
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