God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Found the puke drawer
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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