ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
Randomize
