So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
Just cropdusted the office
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
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