I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
