The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Randomize
