but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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