So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
