And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
Randomize
