if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Randomize
