Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
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