So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
